North Korea

I just finished an engaging book about the lives of North Korean defectors called Nothing to Envy. I always kinda knew about North Korea, but I don't think I was ever aware until reading this book. When I was reading through it, I was constantly in shock and in anger about the condition of the country. The dictatorship. The famine. The economy. The brainwashing. I just couldn't believe it. You hear all the stats in the news, but they are just numbers. But when you hear the stories of people who lived and suffered through it...man, it just hits the heart. The images that stick in my mind are the tree bark they would pulverize to make digestible, the man who was publicly executed for a "crime" committed merely to survive, the children with normal-sized heads but incredibly stunted limbs, and how Chinese dogs ate more food than North Korean doctors. Crazy stuff. Ridiculous stuff!

I also watched this documentary of Lisa Ling following a humanitarian eye doctor into North Korea. It is a rare moment when Kim Jong-Il allows any foreigners into his country.

So after the blind are healed and able to see again, they immediately praise the great leader, Kim Jong-Il, whom they worship as a god. They believe he is so good to them and all blessings they receive come from him. They adore him. My initial reaction to their outbursts of praises to Kim Jong-Il were, "These people are psycho! Don't they know that this man is the reason for their suffering?" But I also had this wild and crazy thought that these people don't look so different than Christians. Think about it. When suffering comes, we learn to still praise God because we believe He is good. When healing comes, we credit God instead of the doctor that treated us. In a way, we're a bit "psycho" ourselves. Non-Christians look at us and say, "Why do you believe God is so good if He allowed all this shit to happen?" I don't know, sometimes I feel that Christian spirituality is a little too far-fetched for me, a little crazy to actually believe. Yet He grips my heart in a way I can't really explain to others, or even to myself!

If anything, I guess this shows how our hearts really were created to worship something or someone. Its just a matter of who or what.

My Heros

Couple months ago, I blogged about a fictional book I read titled, A Cup of Friendship. The main character is a single woman from America that runs a coffee shop in the heart of Afghanistan. I love this woman. She is strong and fearless and compassionate. The part that touched me the most was in the beginning of the story. She walks into the local Womens Center, and while she's there, she notices a dirty, beaten-up young woman pleading for a place to stay. (She was a young widow sold to the "Mafia" as payment for her uncle's debt owed to them. But they beat her up and dumped her on the side of the road because they found out she was pregnant. Meaning, she's utterly worthless.) She had no family, no money, no home. She was an unmarried woman with child, and that was the ultimate shame. And she looked for help from the agency that supposedly supports women like this. Yet all they could offer her was one night stay, but then they'd have to kick her out into the streets. And from there, her only option was to be someone's slave or prostitute...or just be killed.

And that's when my hero steps in. She takes this desperate young woman into her home and gives her a job in her coffee shop, all the while knowing that an unmarried pregnant woman brings shame not just upon herself, but for everyone associated. Taking in this woman could have ruined her business and put their very lives in danger. But my hero takes the risk because her compassion runs deep, and she values this woman's life even though everyone in society spits on her or wants her dead. She gives her hope and a future.

I want to be a woman like that. In the very core of my being, I want to be a woman like that. She reminds me of the mom (Sandra Bullock's character) in The Blind Side. If you've seen the movie, you know what I mean. Ahhh, that stuff really gets me. I want to be an instrument of God's hope and healing, but sometimes I wonder if my heart has the capacity to give like that. God hasn't given me such an opportunity yet, but I hope--I HOPE!--God will prepare me for that day.

Female Pastors

So there's this church I've been visiting quite a bit lately. I like many things about it. I feel like people are warm and accepting. I feel like they want to love and serve their neighbors in tangible, holistic ways. I get a sense of freedom: freedom for the individual in Christ, and freedom in the church. I've definitely experienced God's healing and comfort there. And its so close to my house!! I always wanted to go to a church close to my house, in my own community.

But the one thing I can't sit with right now is the woman pastor. I mean, I've met her and I love her heart for Jesus, and I don't doubt that she is doing amazing things for God's Kingdom. But I was always taught that women should not teach men or have authority over men, like it says in 1 Timothy 2 and other places in the Bible. So the idea of a woman pastor is completely bizarre to me. Am I being too conservative? Or does it really matter what gender my pastor is? Shoot, I really have to go to the Bible on this one...

Jesus in Afghanistan?

I just finished reading a fictional book about an American woman that runs a coffeehouse in Afghanistan, basically in the middle of a war zone. That's such a rad idea. Creating a space where people of the community, locals and foreigners alike, can meet and find peace amongst this crazy world. What was most intriguing to me about this story was to see how the Western/European worldview of the foreigners clashed with the Eastern/Islamic worldview of the Afghans. I think my mind was debating itself all throughout the book, arguing that this aspect of Western society is correct, or that aspect of Eastern society is better. Stuff like that. I often asked myself the question, if Jesus was Lord in this society, what would be different? What would be the same? I feel like I won't really know the answers, especially because each culture/people group is so different. But I'm eager to know. But more importantly, eager to see Jesus living amongst these different cultures. More thoughts on the book to come...

Harry Potter Bandwagoner

I've never really been interested in the Harry Potter series until I saw the movie trailer for Deathly Hallows Part 2. IT ALL ENDS. Seriously, the trailer itself is quite epic. Long time ago, I saw the first and second movie, but decided then that it was too scary for me haha, and I never wanted to watch another one. Yet, this trailer...sooo epic. I recently decided that I would watch all the other films just so that I can watch this spectacular ending. So far, I'm at The Order of the Phoenix. And all I have to say is: why doesn't Harry get with Hermoine?! She's already one of his best friends, and she's so cute! Sigh, some guys need to open their eyes to the girl next door.

And I LOVE Luna Lovegood. She's so calm and whatevers, like she doesn't care (or notice) what other people think of her. I totally want to be her friend. I think I would be amused to no end.
...Or maybe I just want stoner friends. =P

How This Blog Got Its Name

Birth of a new blog for a new era!

I was visiting a new small group last week, and I asked the question: What were your childhood nicknames and how did you get them?

Of course, I shared the nickname/phrase of mine that stuck the most: Lindar zai nar? (Beijing accent)
But because I'm Canto, someone followed it up with a: Lindo hai bindo?!!

And I thought: AWESOME.

(Since when did I start using colons?)